One of the top news items in the NY/NJ Metro area this past week has been the execution murders of three college students and the seriously wounding of another in Jersey City, NJ this past week. It appears that these kids were accosted by a group of male persons in a school yard and, after apparently robbing them of just a few dollars, had them on their knees and executed each one, shooting them in the head. One victim survived and is in critical condition and under extreme police protection. The other three were buried this past weekend. All four were freshman about to attend college together.

 

Two of the gunmen, a 15yr old male and a 28yr old male are already in custody, charged with three counts of first degree murder and one count of felony attempted murder. Three others are being sought, including a 16yr old male. As horrific as this crime is, it appears that the 28yr old male currently in custody, was out on bail awaiting trial on child molestation charges. He is also an illegal alien. Undocumented.  (Oh, and our taxes will now pay for his public defender attorney by the way.) A NJ Congressman is currently proposing changes to current law requiring the reporting to the Dept of Immigration any undocumented (illegal) alien arrested on felony charges and the withholding of bail for these illegals.

 

Now this brings a question, albeit, a controversial one at that. Why isn’t there already a law, or at least a policy, that any law enforcement agency anywhere in this country, who has any undocumented person in their custody, arrested on felony charges, turned over to the Dept of Immigration?  Shouldn’t that be at least a minimum requirement for any illegal alien, that if they want to exist in this country, benefit from this country’s medical and any social assistance despite immigration status, at least, be required to lead a lawful life or else at the very least face deportation?? Did you know that no one can be denied access to the Courts based on their immigration status? Anyone can sue you, win a monetary award against you, go after your assets to collect that judgment and not be required to prove legal status in the USA?

 

I am all in favor of our open arm policy. “Give me your tired, your poor. Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free. The retched refuse of your teeming shores. These are the huddled masses brought to me. I rest my head beside the golden shore”.  I understand that we are a haven for anyone trying to make a better life for themselves. Immigration is what this country is founded on. We cannot deny illegals access to health care or social programs. It would be a health crises for everyone. It would increase crime and other social ills. It would not stop people from coming. We are a melting pot. It is one of those wonderful things that makes our country unique. And I am sure that the great majority of illegal immigrants are lawful and abiding. They make crap wages and will do the dirtiest jobs for those crap wages, jobs that most “Americans” wouldn’t ever do. I understand that the backbone of this country is the immigrant. Other than our Native Americans, no one can declare themselves to be able to trace their lineage back and not have immigrants to this country in their family history. It is who we are.

 

But, I believe that all understanding and looking the other way, goes out the window when felonies are committed. And, as we support “innocent until proven guilty”, until that undocumented person is cleared of any charges, they should be held without bail. They should be reported to the Dept of Immigration. They should be deported irregardless of guilt or innocence. At the very least.  There should be no “rights” given when a situation like this arises. At the very least, lead a lawful life here. Every action has a reaction, every action has a consequence. Anyone caught breaking the law in a country that an undocumented alien has entered illegally should be deported. Immediately. If that perhaps deters even some from committing these heinous crimes, then perhaps a life can be spared from such a violent end.  

Friendship turned to betrayal. In one swift moment what seemed like a trusted and close relationship turned to dust when a friend made a bad decision. She was shocked more than angry, and disappointed more than hurt. She had been hurt before. Devastated. And so, when this damaged friendship arose, she was stronger, more introspective and able to put it behind her.

It wasn’t too long ago, that she was devastated by the betrayal of a friend. It wasn’t too long ago when this betrayal nearly broke her spirit. She never saw it coming. She never anticipated that the friendship she held so dear to her heart could shatter so. It took her many years to put it behind her and to emerge from the darkness. But when a person is hurt like she was, and the damage so severe, it becomes difficult to let anyone into that place deep into the center of one’s heart. And she protected that place deep inside herself. Protected it so that no one could ever hurt her like that again. Her wall was built during her emergence from the darkness. She was protected.

And so, when this friendship became impossible to continue, she stepped back, saddened at the loss of a friend, but standing in the light rather than immersed in the darkness. Her wall intact.

The loss of a friend is never easy. It is like losing a part of one’s self. It is replacing a future of possibilities with the memories of the past. It is moving forward in solitude to new experiences. It is learning to begin again. But life is a series of beginnings and endings. And with each beginning, she will emerge stronger to face each ending. Each experience will add a new part of herself as each loss will take an old part away. And so, she moves forward. Open to new possibilities. Open to new friendships. Open to the light.  Forward in solitude.

 

 

Driving everyday as I do, and frequently stuck in heavy traffic, it has come to my attention how many people have those ribbons stuck to the back of their vehicles in a variety of colors and for a variety of causes. It seems we Americans have become ribbon crazy. I remember being entertained by peoples’ bumper stickers. It was a form of self expression that not only shared the vehicle owner’s viewpoint with his or her fellow man/woman, but entertained us as well. I miss that. It seems to have all been replaced with peoples’ needs to plaster all these ribbons all over the back of their vehicles. Have a cause? Shout  it out with a ribbon. There’s a ribbon for every cause and every disease.

 

But with Crayola having over a hundred colors out there, it disappoints me to see that there are only a handful of those colors being used for all those hundreds of causes and diseases out there. I thought as a people we’d be much more creative. Splash those colors all over America. Make each cause a unique color. It seems that when you put your ribbon on your vehicle, you are shouting out for a number of different causes. Some you may not want to promote. Maybe there should be a ribbon for that. Let’s promote “Choose a Creative and Unique Color for Your Cause Awareness” Below is the official list of causes and their ribbon colors. Is your ribbon there? Is your cause there? Do you have one to add and what color would you choose? Come on everyone. I know you have one on your car…. “Support our Troops”, “Breast Cancer Awareness”  “IBS Awareness” “ Pagan Pride” “Children Left Unattended in Cars”….. come on…. Fess up. What’s YOUR cause?

 

Awareness ribbon colors and their meanings.

Red = Aids/HIV, substance and drug abuse (includes inhalents), MADD, DARE, Epidermolysis Bullosa, love, heart disease- (also uses the red dress symbol), supraventicular tachycardia, Wolff-parkinson-White Syndrom (WPW), Pro-life, hypertension, Evans Syndrome Orange = hunger, leukemia, cultural diversity and racial tolerance, feral cats, motorcyslist safety, Multiple Sclerosis -wristband only, self injury, reflex sympathetic dystrophy, Support of the Jewish settlements in the Gaza Strip and North Samaria (Israel), skin cancer (with a sun in the center of the loop) Yellow = Support our troops, POW/MIA, suicide prevention, adoptive parents, spina biffida, missing children (amber alert), endometriosis, sarcoma (with or without a sunflower), bladder cancer, liver disease and liver cancer, hydrocephalus or hydrocephaly, hope in general, boycott Aruba (hope for Natalee) Green = Tissue and organ donation or transplants, depression (both adults and children), bipolar disorder, mental health or illness, eye injuries, Tourette's Syndrome, bone marrow transplants and donation, Fanconi's Syndrome, worker and driving safety, Von Hippel Lindau, glaucoma, missing children, leukemia, environment, Fibrodysplasia Ossificans, kidney cancer or kidney disease, neural tube defects, Mitochondrial Disease, growth and rebuilding, Progressiva, Cerebral Palsy, Save Darfur, Stem Cell Research Blue (Navy) = Child abuse prevention, arthritis, free speech, crime victims rights, waterquality, colon cancer, Dysautonomia, hystiocytosis, Erb's Palsy, AnkylosingSpondylitis, domestic violence, water safety (flooding, drowning and accidents), Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome (ARDS), dystonia, interstitial cystitis, bracial plexus injury, Epstein-Barr Virus (EBV), Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Alopecia, Reyes Syndrome, education, Steven Johnson Syndrome, short bowel syndrome, Myositis, Leukodystrophy, Hurricane Support, police officers lost in the line of duty (AKA, the Thin Blue Line), Syringomyelia Purple = Domestic violence, religious tolerance, animal abuse, the victims of 9/11 (includespolice and firefighters), pancreatic cancer, Chron's Disease and colitis, cystic fibrosis, leimyosarcoma, macular degeneration, Sjogren's Syndrome, fibromyalgia,lupus, sarcoidosis, the homeless, Mucolipidoses, thyroid cancer, ADD, ADHD, alzheimers, cancer survivor (this is a general color that anyone who has survived cancer can wear), Pagan pride, Arnold Chiari Malformation, children left unattended in cars White =  Innocence, victims of terrorism, peace, right to life, diabetes, sexual assault of students, retinal blastoma, alzheimers, adoption, bone disease and bone cancer,anti-child pornography on the internet, carbon monoxide poisoning (CO poisoning),post partum depression, Scoliosis, Anti-stalking, Men working to end men's violence against women. Black = Mourning, melanoma, anti-gangs, Anti-terrorism in Spain, narcolepsy, POW-MIAs, Primary Billiary Cirrhosis, Amish Support Brown = Anti-tobacco, colorectal cancer Gray = Diabetes, brain cancer, asthma and allergies Lime Green - Lymphoma, Lyme Disease, Muscular Dystrophy-wristband only, Ivemark Syndrome, Sandhoff Disease, Support for Adoptees Rights to open adoption records that have been sealed. Teal = Ovarian, cervical, uterine (all gynecological) cancers, food allergies, substance abuse, sexual assault, Myasthenia Gravis, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, agoraphobia, panic or stress disorders (includes PTSD), Dissociative Identity Disorder Turquoise = Native American reparations (dark teal items work too), interstitial cystitis (IC Network designation) Burgundy = Hospice care, multiple myeloma, cesarian sections,  headaches and migraines, adhesions, thrombophilia and other coagulation or blood factor disorders, meningitis, polio survivor, Hughes Syndrome, brain aneurysm, Hirschsprung's Disease (Congenital Megacolon)/children undiagnosed or misdiagnosed with rare disorders or diseases. Periwinkle = Eating disorders, pulmonary hypertension, esophageal or stomach cancer, GERD, IBS Pink = Breast Cancer, Birth Parents, cleft palate Hot Pink - Inflammatory breast cancer Pale Yellow = Spina biffida Peach = Uterine Cancer, Endometrial Cancer Cream = Paralysis, spinal cord injuries, diseases or disorders, Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA) Light Green = Pelvic Pain (chronic), Celiac Disease, STD Awareness, HPV Emerald Green =  Homeopathy awareness Light Blue = Prostate cancer, mens health, thyroid disease, lymphedema, Addison's Disease,Trisomy 18, Velo-Cardio Facial Syndrome, Klinefelter's Syndrome, hyperaldosteronism, scleroderma, Behcets Disease, Graves Disease, Shprintzen Syndrome, Edward's Syndrome Lavender = All cancers (general cancer awareness), epilepsy, hypokalemic periodic paralysis, rett syndrome, foster care or foster parents Orchid (violet) = Testicular cancer Pearl = lung cancer or lung disease, Multiple Sclerosis, Mesothelioma, emphysema Silver = Children with physical or learning disabilities, Parkinson's Disease, any disorders or diseases of the brain including strokes, elderly abuse Gold = Childhood Cancer, COPD, Embryonal Rhabdomysarcoma Light Baby Pink and Blue = Pregnancy and infant loss, SIDS, Male breast cancer Red and White = Head and neck cancer, aplastic anemia, Squamous Cell Carcinoma Red and Yellow = Hepatitis C Virus (HCV) Red, White and Blue = Patriotism, 9/11 victims, fireworks safety Red and Blue with a Heart = Congenital Heart Defects (also red,blue and red stripes) Blue And Yellow = Down Syndrome, designated drivers (The Hero Campaign) Purple Ribbon with a Red rose = Cystic Fibrosis Purple And Green = Hospice And Pallative Care Purple And Blue = Rheumatoid arthritis, pediatric stroke Purple and Yellow = Chemical Injury (any chemical related boo boos) Jigsaw Puzzle Ribbon = Autism Prism = Multiple Schlerosis (MS) Orchid and Orange = psoriasis Lime Green and Aqua = adult stem cell donor Teal And Pink = Hereditary Breast Cancer or a combo ribbon for gynecological and breast cancers. Pink and Gold - Phyllodes Tumors Black and Pink = Bone Marrow Donor, loss of a daughter Black and Lt. Blue = Loss of a son Black And White = Carcinoid Syndrome Cancer (zebra stripes) and anti-racism Black White And Black (three stripes) = Vaccine danger Gold and Black = Platelett donor Gold and Silver = All hearing or ear related disorders and diseases Ivory, Burgundy and Ivory = Oral head and neck cancers Ivory Lace = Osteoporosis Navy Blue and White Pinstripes = ALS (Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis), Lou Gehrig's Disease Yellow, Lime Green, Orange, Aqua, Hot Pink= Myelodysplastic Syndrome Orange, Green, Blue, Purple, Yellow = STD awareness Red White and Red (3 stripes) = Leukemia and Lymphoma Blue and White = In memory of Columbine, Teen cancer RAINBOW = Gay pride or rights movement Red and Black = Murder victims (both adults and children) Orange and Red = Myeloproliferative Disorders Blue, White and Pink (3 stripes) = Parental Alienation Syndrome

Hi Everyone!

 

I know I’ve been absent for quite a while and I truly miss you all.  But life has gotten a bit hectic these past few months, and the luxury of writing has had to take a back seat for the time being.

 

We’ve had a few close relatives taken ill. My Aunt, (who passed her 83^rd birthday in June, and in the hospital), suffered a gallbladder attack of a pretty severe level, causing her to suffer a heart attack, which led to a whole can of worms being uncovered about the weak status of her heart. A team of doctors took up a personal campaign to put her back on her feet, and after almost losing her, the wonderful doctors and medical staff at Colombia Presbyterian Hospital pulled off a miraculous feat. Her new cardiologist actually told us that the gallbladder attack was her lucky break, because had she not had it, she would have dropped dead within a month. Her heart was very, very weak.  She still can’t have the surgery for her gallbladder and has a drainage bag attached to her, but hopefully they will eventually clear her for the surgery soon. After 9 weeks in the hospital, she is now home recovering. She is still extremely fragile, and very depressed poor thing, but this too shall pass and I’m confident she will get back to most of her routine if she gives herself a chance. She’s frustrated and worries about how she’ll ever be able to go back to work (can you believe it? I’m trying to retire by 55 for goodness sakes!).

 

Loverboy’s cousin/uncle, who is 72, has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer that has already spread to his liver. He had to rush out to Manila on Wednesday, and will be there for a couple of weeks. This dear, dear man is by far our favorite of all his relatives. He is the dearest, most gentle, honest and caring human being we have ever known. He has always looked after Loverboy like a little brother and has embraced him and me through all things good and bad. The two of them have a few business ventures together, and he is the only one we have ever been able to trust, knowing he would never do anything dishonest. When we saw him in February, he did not look good, but told us it was his diabetes. He may have thought that at the time, but found out later that that was not what was wrong. I am crushed to be losing such a dear and wonderful man and am praying for him.

 

On the up side, my heart medication seems to be working, and I’m feeling so much better. No more chest pains or pressure. My chronic cough seems to have subsided 90%. I’m sleeping better. Still a little low on the energy, but I’m getting better. Loverboy and I have gained quite a bit of weight, and that extra poundage I’m sure is adding to the lack of energy. We joke about how big we’re getting, but both of us know it’s not healthy and have to really try to lose it.

 

Work is hectic, overtime a few days a week are exhausting. We’re still working on restoring our boat in my “spare” time evenings and weekends, and the darn thing still is not in the water. But it’s looking magnificent. My house is still disorganized and I’m taking today to try and take care of some much neglected straightening out. The front and back yards are overgrown with big weeds, and I’ve just pretty much given up on it this year. Next year I vow to do better. Just too busy. 

 

I just want to tell you all that I’m still alive and kicking and to thank you all for dropping by from time to time to say hi and to give me a cyber-hug. I love you all. Big Chris, kktaylor, Colo, Bella, Miss Lou, Hawk, POH, and anyone else I have missed. I love you all and thank you so much for checking in on me from time to time. I can’t tell you how much it means to me to know I haven’t been forgotten in my long absence. Things are starting to slow down a bit, and I’ll try to post at least once a week.

 

I hope everyone is having a wonderful summer!!

 

Love to you ALL!!

Pilar

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I know I've been away for a long time. I'm in the middle of some heavy family problems coupled with a hectic schedule. I haven't had a minute to myself for almost a month. I just wanted to check in with you all and let you know I haven't disappeared and that I'm okay. I need to be away from the Stream for a while, but it won't be a permanent absence. I just need some more time to deal with all the stuff going on with my family and I'll be back as soon as I can. The worst is almost over and thanks to God. I knew He heard my prayers and wouldn't leave my side. I'll explain all when I can get back to my life and my routine.

Until then,
Love to all of you,
Pilar